Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for April, 2010

Each week when Seacoast Peers for Careers meets I ask the participants to share a blessing for the week – something good that happened. These are especially meaningful when they occur BECAUSE of unemployment. My blessing last week was very simple: I had exact change, no more, no less.

Although the air was quite cool, I had the sunroof open on my car while driving from an appointment to the weekly meeting of Seacoast Peers for Careers. It was warm and sunny enough in the car that stopping by my favorite ice cream stand seemed like a good idea.

I pulled in to Dover Delite thinking about which flavor of Shain’s of Maine ice cream I was going to get – chocolate, chocolate oreo, or my latest discovery, java crunch. When I checked my wallet, however, I had two singles, one dime, and nine pennies – 21 cents short of the $2.40 needed for a kiddie cup.

Darn.

I looked in the pocket of my purse, the glove compartment, the token holder, all to no avail.

Darn again.

I went back to my purse and fished around in the bottom, under the sunglasses, the tissues, and the Chapstick. What did I feel? I pulled out some change – 2 dimes and 1 penny. Golden!

Two singles, 3 dimes, 10 pennies. I had exactly enough! Thank you, God! (Talk about granting the desires of your heart!)

As I savored every bite, it was that much sweeter because of my “miracle.”

Once again, it’s the little things that count for so much.

Read Full Post »

Last evening our doorbell rang. There was a woman asking about the house next door to us, which has been for sale since fall and has not been regularly occupied for about two years. The owner had been around a few weeks ago to move out some things; but other than that, there has been no activity.

The woman has driven by the house a few times and noticed a cat in various windows and was concerned about it. My husband asked about the coloring of the cat, and it matched the one reported missing about 3.5 weeks ago by the young family that recently moved in across the street.

The realtor listed on the sign lives locally, so my husband called her and explained the situation. She came down with a key. A few minutes later, our neighbor was inside trying to capture his long-missing cat who was doing all it could to hide, energy apparently not an issue. We’re assuming that the cat must have gone inside when the doors were left open during the partial move.

I’m not sure I want to know what the cat has been eating and where it has been resting; but from what Bob said, while it’s a bit scraggly, it doesn’t appear to be any the worse for the experience.

Two parents, four kids, two dogs, and one cat, are all home safe and sound on the Sunday night before school vacation.

All is well with their world.

Read Full Post »

It’s been quite a while since I have blogged. After reading today’s entry, you will understand why.

The sun was streaming through my bedroom window last Sunday morning. It felt so good on my face as I lay there in the quiet. I immediately started singing John Denver’s words in my mind: “Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy. Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry. Sunshine on the water looks so lovely. Sunshine always makes me high.”

While far from a “sun worshipper,” I find being in the warm sunlight so restorative to my spirit. So I was disappointed when the recent trip my husband and I took to Florida during spring break in March proved to be pretty cold and windy. While it was good to get away, not getting to spend some time just relaxing with a book while sitting outside in warm sunshine (oh, and maybe taking a nap there too), left me unable to truly pull back from the cares of my life and really relax.

And I so needed to do that. Relaxing had become foreign to me …

You see, the events of the last couple of months converged leaving me in the darkness. Anxiety had become my constant companion. I’ve been nervous each morning before I head to class and each time I have to be part of a group. My confidence is shaken and my self-esteem is low. While I have been in some new situations for sure, this is so uncharacteristic for me. Added to those feelings and exacerbating them were some medical concerns. Some meds I had started shortly before the start of the new year made my blood pressure go crazy. This, of course, created anxiety of its own. As my primary care provider worked with me to adjust meds and get my BP down, I found myself falling into a depression. I found myself at a very low point just as we came back from Florida.

My birthday that next week was celebrated back at the doctor’s office where I arrived in tears. While relieved to learn that one of the meds being used to control my BP and also relieve some of my anxiety can cause depression, I realized that hitting a second birthday without full-time employment was also contributing to my downward spiral. I was not feeling sorry for myself but was unable to stop those feelings of inadequacy and failure that had surrounded me, also pulling me towards the abyss.

As I write this, I am not completely out of the woods. However, my BP is under control, my newer meds don’t appear to be causing any issues, and I feel less nervous. I’m still a bit unsure as I leave the house each day, but I have not cried in a number of days. I am still very tired a good part of the time, but I am laughing more and finding joy again in those simple pleasures of a husband and family who love me and all the other blessings in my life.

It’s cold and rainy in Dover again, weather so different from the first day of spring almost a month ago and the beautiful warm Easter weekend of two weeks ago. But this, too, shall pass. This is New England after all, where the weather changes regularly. It is because of that change that I so appreciate the warm sunny days when we have them.

And so it is with life.

Read Full Post »